Judges

by

Gary DeVaney

“Intelligence is Categorical”

“Insanity is Contagious”

“A High Percentage of Stupid is Stubborn”

Samson

Theologians agree that this book was written by unknown authors. It gives an account for each generation abandoning the Biblical God for other Gods and the manner in which God deals with it.

Judges 1:4-6 God slew 10,000 and cut off Adonibezek’s thumbs and big toes.

Judges 2:11-14 God’s chosen people forsook Him, and God sold the Israelites out to their enemies.

Bible C&V evidence: God’s chosen people forsook Him. God sold them out to their enemies.

Hummm, it seems that God cannot understand why He is unpopular. I know a couple of former US Presidents like that. 43 & 45

Judges 3:12-29 The Israelites offended God. God strengthened Eglon, King of Moab against them, who defeated them. The Israelites cried out to God. God raised up, for them, a savior, the Benjamite, Ehud, who was left-handed. Ehud made himself a foot long knife and hid it under his clothes on his right thigh. He told King Eglon he had a message for him and in private thrust the dagger into King Eglon’s belly. He died. Ehud made good his escape and the Israelites killed 10,000 Moabites. Not a man escaped.

God used their enemy, a Moabite King, to defeat His chosen Israel.

Israel repented and God again used His chosen Israelites to murder 10,000 Moabites.

Is it documented that God had “Biblical saviors” before Jesus Christ?

Judges 3:31 Shamgar slew 600 Philistines.

It seems this “savior” is also into God’s murdering. Maybe, if we had a female leader, things wouldn’t be so bloody. Can you imagine the Israelites having a female judge or a female leader of any kind? Is it testosterone that does God’s murdering work?

Judges 4:2 God sold Israel out and into slavery to Jabin, the Canaanite King.

God does not care who He murders just to get His way.

Lawyer critic: That’s for another book.

No. It fits this work.

Here comes a couple of God’s Biblical heroines:

Judges 4:4 The Prophetess Deborah was judging Israel.

What? A woman? I’ll bet the Rabbis down-play this passage. Had you heard of this?

The dogma: God gave Human Beings freedom of choice. However, God gets mad, sad and sorry and destroys people throughout the Bible because of the choices they make.

Judges 4:16-21 (As Deborah prophesized): The entire army of Sisera was slain, not one man survived. Jael, Heber’s wife, aids an ally by inviting Sisera to sleep in her tent while she kept guard. She gave him milk and covered him. Then, she took a tent peg and a hammer and nailed him through his head into the ground while he slept. He died.

Note: Two of God’s female Biblical heroes; Deborah is an Israelite Judge over God’s chosen and Jael nails Sisera through his head.

As evidence of Deborah and Jael, women who murder can be God-like too.

A revisit: Judges 5:24-27 Blessed above women be Jael. He asked for water, she gave him milk. She reached for the peg and workman’s mallet. She hammered Sisera, crushed his head. She smashed in his temple. At her feet, he fell still, slain.

How come it’s “God’s chosen” that wages war, mostly against other of “God’s chosen”? Even if one whips the other’s buttocks, both tend to suffer much. Does the Biblical God feed on suffering?

Judges 6:12-16 An angel of God said Gideon was His champion and that God was with him. Gideon said: If God is with us, why has all this happened to us. Now God has abandoned us. God said: It is I who send you. Gideon said: My family is the meanest (Catholic) the poorest (KJV) in Manasseh and I am the most significant (Catholic) I am the least (KJV) in my father’s house. God said: Go murder Midian to the last man.

Here is another example of documented differences between the Catholic and the King James versions of the Bible.

Remember Genesis 25: After Sarah died, Abraham took a wife named Keturah. She bared him sons, one of which was Midian. God said “Go murder Midian”. God murdered more of Abraham’s descendants. God shows no loyalty to His Biblical Heroes.

Later, in the New Testament, God planned and executed the torture and murder of His own Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ loyally served the Biblical God. Jesus brought Eternal-Torment, after death, into God’s agenda for Human Beings. Who said: God does not change?

Judges 6:22-23 Gideon said: God, I have seen the angel of God, face to face. God said: Be calm, don’t fear. You won’t die.

Judges 8:10 God murdered 120,000 men that drew sword.

Are you numb as to numbers this God has murdered yet?

Judges 8:21 Gideon murdered Zebah and Zalmunna.

Judges 8:30 Gideon (one of the Biblical God’s heroes) had 70 sons, for he had many wives. His concubine bore him a son whom he named Abimelech.

Judges 9:1-5 Abimelech asked the citizens of Shechem: Which is better for you, being ruled by 70 men or 1 man? They picked him. Abimelech murdered his 70 brothers.

Abimelech murdered his 70 brothers. Another candidate for God.

Judges 9:53-56 A woman fractured Abimelech’s head. He ordered his armor-bearer to finish him off and to say that the woman did not kill him. His attendant ran him through, and he died. God took revenge on Abimelech for killing his 70 brothers.

Here is another of God’s murderous female heroes. Abimelech did not want a woman to get credit of killing him. The Bible keeps her anonymous.

Judges 10:7 The anger of God was hot against Israel and He sold them out. KJV

Was this due to Abimelech’s murdering his 70 brothers?

Judges 10:12-14 God said: When you cried out, I saved you. You still forsook Me and worshipped other gods. So, I will save you no more. Go and cry out to the gods you have chosen and let them save you.

What other gods? Did God admit here that there are other gods?

Judges 15:14-16 Samson was tied up. The Philistines shouted against him. God released Samson’s hands. He found a jawbone of an ass and killed 1,000 men. Samson boasted: With the jawbone of an ass, I have slain a thousand men.

Who of God’s heroes, so far, have not murdered anyone? Could Samson be but another of God’s horny, murderous heroes?

Judges 11:1 Jephthah was born of a harlot.

Jephthah: A God’s hero, who was born of a harlot?

I get accused that I misinterpret and misrepresent Bible C&Vs.

Judges 11:30-39 Jephthah vowed to God: Give me victory and I will give to You the first thing that comes through my door for a burnt offering. This “in-control” God had Jephthah murder 20 cities for Him and then God had Jephthah’s happy daughter come through his door, to welcome her father home. Jephthah gave his virgin daughter two months to mourn her virginity because she couldn’t live long enough to bear children. She had to die. By burnt offering, Jephthah sacrificed his 13-year-old daughter to your Biblical God.

Any tears?

God’s hero, Jephthah, murdered 20 cities for God. Then he sacrificed his only child, his virgin daughter, who obviously loved her daddy. Did “know it all” God arrange for her to greet Jephthah at his door upon his homecoming? Do you think that God still enjoyed smelling her burning fat from around her organs as depicted in Genesis 8, Exodus 29, and Leviticus 1:9?

God did not change as He later did not call off the Human sacrifice of His own son, Jesus Christ.

Judges 12:6-7 Jephthah goes on to murder 42,000 brother Israelites. God rewards him to judge Israel for 6 years.

Today, our Godly United States Government still sacrifices our best babies for its political killing agendas. Other than the US population sounding like fearful, obedient sheep, we do little to stop it.

Aren’t the Ephraimites, who are named after Ephraim, the son of Joseph, Israelites too? The Ephraimites came from Joseph’s seed. Why wasn’t this tribe called Josephites? There is no “tribe of Joseph”. Wasn’t God’s favorite Hebrew bloodline compromised with Ephraim and his brother Manasses due to their mother being Egyptian? Isn’t this more Biblical hypocrisy?

Judges 12:8-9 Then, Ibzan judged Israel. He had 30 sons and 30 daughters.

Judges 12:13 Abdon judged Israel. He had 40 sons.

What? How many of God’s appointed leaders were documented sex maniacs? God’s chosen Israelite leaders are documented, by Bible C&V, to be obsessed by sex and had sex with tons of women.

Boy, that could never happen with our leaders today – could it?

Judges 13 Israel again offended God, so it’s 40 more years of slavery for them with the Philistines. An angel of God appeared to a woman (Hannah) and said: You are barren. You will conceive. Be careful to take no wine or strong drink. The son you bear is to be consecrated to God from the womb. He will deliver Israel from the Philistines. He was named Samson.

Note: This is a noteworthy C&V passage concerning alcohol.

God slam-dunks His chosen Israelites again and again, each time to predestine a savior to save them. This time it’s Samson. Then, the re-cycle continues. What torture! What a God!

Did you ever notice that many of God’s Old Testament hero’s mothers are old, barren, can’t have children, and are maternally dysfunctional. Then magically, they have children.

In the New Testament, there is a young, virgin mother named Mary, who many Catholics still swear remained and died a virgin, despite vast documentation showing she had numerous kids.

This God punishes His children while rewarding His enemies. Sound fair? Righteous? Good? Loving? Want to invite Him home? Would you want this God to baby-sit your child, especially if your child is sick, handicapped or has sinned?

Judges 13:24 The woman (Hannah) bore a son and named him Samson and God blessed him.

Samson is probably a good guy, right? Virtuous? Wholesome?

Judges 14:1-4 Samson wanted for a wife a Philistine woman (outside of his religion) to provide The Biblical God an opportunity against the Philistines.

The Biblical God arranged for an opportunity to fight and murder a group of people? What a model God is for Human history. Who needs a Satan?

Judges 14:6 Without weapons, Samson tore a lion to pieces.

Judges 14:8-9 Later, when he returned to marry the woman who pleased him, he ate honey from the lion’s dead carcass. He gave some for his mother and father to eat without telling them that he scooped the honey from the dead lion’s carcass.

Samson is another sick puppy. Boy, can this God ever pick them…　

Judges 14:11-20 Samson bet 30 men 30 tunics to solve a riddle. Upon losing the bet due to his wife, The Spirit of God inspired Samson to murder 30 men in town for their tunics to pay the debt off. Samson’s wife made him lose the bet. Then, she married Samson’s best man.

Samson, God inspired, murdered 30 innocent men so to steal their tunics to pay off a gambling debt”? Good God!

Judges 15:4-5 Samson caught 300 foxes, tied their tails together, set them afire and they burned the countryside.

What kind of a humanitarian touch is this for Samson or for God? Do members of PETA support this God?

Judges 15:6-8 The Philistines asked who had done this and was told it was because Samson’s wife had been given to his best man. The Philistines (while trying to correct the injustice) killed her and her family by fire. Samson, then inflicted great slaughter on her people, (those same Philistines).

Judges 16:1 Samson had sex with a harlot.

Who? What? One of God’s heroes and “good guys” had sex with a what? A harlot – again?

Judges 16:4 Samson fell in love with Delilah.

Judges 16:10 & 13 Samson lied to Delilah.

Judges 16:17 Samson told Delilah the truth about his strength and long hair. The Philistines brought money. While he slept in her lap, she had them shave his head. Then, she began to mistreat him. The Philistines gouged out Samson’s eyes. Samson killed more men and women bringing down the temple than he had killed during his entire lifetime and died himself. Samson judged Israel for 20 years.

Delilah, Samson’s wife had her fellow Philistines shave Samson’s head to take his powers. God then gave Samson the power to destroys the Philistine’s Pagan Temple. Samson murdered many. Yes! But didn’t Samson, like Jesus, also commit suicide?

Wasn’t Samson, with his murderous, lying, whoring character consecrated from the womb to serve God in this manner?

Judges 18:7-10 Laish, those whom you go against are a trusting people. God has put them in your power (to murder them?)

Judges 18:27-28 They attacked Laish, a quiet and trusting people. The Israelites murdered them and destroyed their city by fire.

Critic / believer: I never seen God kill nobody. I don’t care what that book says. He never done it.

What? They were a quiet and trusting people and God ordered their murders? I am about sick of this murderous bunch and their Boss. Are these the beautiful Bible stories that the masses worship?

Judges 19 A Levite man’s concubine, who was unfaithful to him visits her father’s house. Her master, the Levite man, spends time there. They leave to go home. On their way they seek shelter in Gilbeah, where they are taken in by an old man and his daughter. Certain men of the tribe of Benjamin knock at their door wanting the Levite man to come out so they could have sex with him. The old man begs them to take his daughter or the man’s concubine instead, stating: Do what you want with them. (This part is a Biblical parallel to the Lot and his 2 daughters story). The husband seized his concubine and thrust her outside the door to them (nice guy). They all had sex with her all night and she fell down at the door until daylight. Her master finding her, told her to get up. She couldn’t. He put her on an ass and took her to their home where he cut her into 12 pieces, including her bones. He then sent the 12 pieces to the 12 tribes of Israel.

Judges 20:17- 21 The Israelites assembled 400,000 footmen with sword and attacked the Benjamites. 1/10th of the tribes was gathered. 26,000 Benjamites faced the enemy, their brother Israelis. The first day the Benjamites killed 22,000 Israelis.

Judges 20:22 The Israelites asked God: Should I again engage my brother Benjamin in battle? God answered: Yes. They should.

One can almost hear this God say: Hurry, I need my fix of blood, pain and agony! Quick! Go kill some of my people! What’s the delay?

Judges 20:24 When they met for the second time, the Benjamites killed another 18,000 Israelites.

God, as the Israelite’s military intelligence officer, flunked this battle.

Judges 20:26-28 The Israelites offered sacrifice to God and He said: Attack tomorrow and you will win.

Judges 20:35 On the third day the Israelis killed 25,100 Benjamites.

God kicked buttocks.

You know that Joseph’s youngest, of the 12 brothers, was Benjamin, whom this tribe descended from. Brother Israelites are again killing their brother Israelites. Oh, God’s impeccable logic and reason!

Judges 20:47 Six hundred Benjamites survived and fled.

Later, they were given Israelite captured virgins taken from an enemy because it was declared that no Israelite women would be a wife to a Benjamite. Benjamin was the younger son of Rachel and Jacob. He was Joseph’s little brother.

Judges 20:48 God’s Israelites murdered the inhabitants of the Benjamite cities they chanced upon. They destroyed, by fire, all the cities they came upon.

Judges 21:10-11 12,000 soldiers were ordered to Jabesh-Gilead to murder those who lived there including women and children. That included all males and all non-virgin women.

Do you understand what is being stated here? GOD! Once you trigger these peoples’ murdering frenzy, they don’t stop or know when to quit. They are chips off the old God.

Judges 29:41 The Benjamites were amazed, for they saw that evil had come among them.

Could all this be the result of inbreeding? Remember: Abraham and his wife, Sarah, were half-brother and sister, same father, different mothers.

Abraham’s son Isaac, a product of incest, was the only documented, Bible C&V, Human sacrifice that God spared. The Koran infers that Abraham’s child sacrifice was Isaac’s older half-brother, Ishmael.

Isaac begot Jacob, who was the Father of 12 sons by 4 different women, 2 sets of sisters or possibly all 4 were 1/2 sisters, daughters of Laban (Torah). At least 2 (Leah and Rachel) were definitely cousins to Jacob.

What one person, who you know, would be educationally impacted if sent to this site?

Comments? Questions? Corrections?

gary@gdevaney.com